Conversations from a Call Center

The following is an actual transcription (at least as far as my powers of total recall are able to function)of a caller I encountered at work.


Caller: Um yea, I'm trying to call this other office and I can't get through their menu.



Me: Well, sir the options you should select to navigate their menu and speak to a representative would be first the #1 for English, then 0, then the#1.



Caller: (whining) But I ammmm. I am pressing 1 and it ain't speakin English. It's talkin "Mexican." And I don't talk Mexican.



Me: Well, that's impossible sir.



Caller: (indignant) NO it AIN'T. I'm pressin 1 and I know English and it ain't English it's Mexican. I'm tellin ya.



Me: Again, sure I assure you that's impossible,because first of all "Mexican" is a nationality, not a language. The language you encountered would have been"Spanish" sir. And, secondly I can assure you that if you press the #1 on your touch tone phone the recording proceeds in English. The #1 would be located as the first numbered option if you are unable to locate it.



Caller: I know how to use a phone ma'am.



Me: Well then the only other possibility is that your phone needs to be repaired, thank you for calling and have a great day!!!